Posted on: 20 December, 2019

Author: Arslan Hassan

There are many reasons for divorce. Partners are unable to fulfill the needs of each other. Sometimes they lose interest after a long period of time. Some marriages also break apart due to their inability to have kids. It is very hard to reorganize yourself after a divorce. In the UK, more than 40% of marriages ended in divorce in 2017. This number has been falling since previous years. But it is due to the fact that fewer couples are interested in getting married today. Divorce often comes as a surprise for many people. The other person does not even get to collect himself in such cases. Most of the time, the life of either one of the partners goes upside down. They are unable to find peace after the divorce. Experts believe that failed marriages cost more than £50 billion to the British economy every year. Most of this cost is related to legal fees, child support, separate living, and lost workdays. Especially when you have been together for so long. There are many challenges in getting over a failed marriage. Many people carry their painful memories throughout their lives. They are unable to move forward in their lives. Some people are unable to focus on work. Some of them get into alcohol or drugs. They cannot make to work properly.  Kids suffer the most after the divorce of their parents. They are unable to focus on studies. They often drop out of school. How to Reinvent Yourself after a Divorce Divorce is not the end of life as we mostly think. Sometimes it’s better than being in a harmful relationship. This article suggests some tips that can be helpful for you. Acceptance: Many people are unable to accept the fact that it’s over. They often blame themselves for divorce.  In such a case, you need to forgive yourself. It’s no use regretting over the decision. You tried your best to protect your marriage. There was nothing more that you could do. You didn’t do anything wrong. So why take on yourself the blame for a failed marriage. Focus on the Present: Stop focusing on what you lost. Start thinking about what you have right now. If you have any kids, give them proper attention. They are all you have now. They need you to be at your best. You have an additional role to play in their lives. You have to be both a father and a mother for your kids. They are suffering as much as you do. Make yourself available for them. They should be able to talk to you about their problems. If not for yourself, do it for your kids. In this way, you should be able to get through a divorce easily. Seek Professional Help: Some people start to avoid talking about their failed marriage. It becomes a habit over time. Talking about your issues makes it easier to go through them. If you feel comfortable, try talking to a professional. Get yourself checked by a mental health professional. Take notice of your mood swings, depression, and anxiety. Get into therapy as soon as possible. Express your feelings to your therapist. It will surely help you in the healing process. Start Looking for Work: You should also get to work once you are back on your feet. Loss of the job is another frustrating thing after a divorce. People are unable to afford separate living arrangements. They aren’t able to pay for the basic needs of their kids. Keeping yourself busy at work keep you away from thinking too much.  So you should start making it back to work regularly. It might feel very hard for you in the beginning. But everything will come back to normal once your routine is set. Love Yourself: Do not forget yourself during this time. Healing does not work if you keep ignoring yourself. You should start working on your physical appearance also. Be organized in your life and keep yourself in good shape. Sometimes, having a pet around you also helps in keeping you distracted. The dog is a great companion for people living alone.  Working out regularly also helps you with depression. Keep your living arrangement clean and tidy. Take care of your furniture, wash your curtains and carpets. There are affordable services to help you in maintaining your living arrangement. Carpet cleaning London might just be what you need in this case. Cherish Your Friends:  It is common for people to isolate themselves from others after a divorce. People stop going to social gatherings and isolation leads to more anxiety and depression. You should leave your comfort if you want to heal quickly. Go out and have fun with your friends. Try to talk to your friends about your problems. If not, share your story with people who are in the same situation as you.  Don’t Look for Rebounds:  There is nothing wrong with needing a human touch in your life. It’s a natural process in human nature. That said, one should not hurry into a new relationship. You should make sure that you are ready for it. Go out and make new friends. Friends that share your thinking. It is good to have an open mind towards other things. Do not assume you know everything about the person in front of you. Our failures make us a better person. So, learn from your previous mistakes. Avoid Revenge: People often become slaves to their emotions. They start doing rash things in their lives. Some people spread rumors while others resort to cyberbullying. This vindictive stance only leads to more sadness. So, avoid inflicting pain on the other person and start living your life with the promise of a better future. Ending Thoughts It may seem that there is no purpose in your life anymore. Life does not stop for a single person. It will not for you as well. There is nothing good in carrying your painful memories along everywhere. Moving on is the best thing to do after a divorce. You have to find a new direction for your life as only then, you will be able to reinvent yourself after a divorce. Source: Free Articles from Arslan Hassan is an electrical engineer with a passion for writing, designing and anything tech-related. His educational background in the technical field has given him the edge to write on many topics. He occasionally writes blog articles for Carpet Cleaning London.